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Dear God, What is wrong with being a good woman to the men in my life?

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I started going out with K after a series of painful heartbreaks. He was a colleague at work and an acquaintance. Sometime during a long chat, I told him about my past experiences with men. I had bottled so much pain in my heart and I needed to talk to someone. The day I told him about all my heartbreaks, the most painful of which was with my baby daddy, something shifted in our friendship. Some kind of bond was created and we became closer than before. We spent a lot of time together, and I found his company enjoyable. On 24th May 2019, he asked me to be his girlfriend. I liked him but I didn’t want to ruin our beautiful friendship by getting into a relationship with him.

I explained my concerns to him, “I haven’t had a friend in a long time so this friendship means so much to me. If we try a relationship and it doesn’t work out, I’ll lose a friend forever.” I remember exactly what he said in response; “Maame, I know all the painful experiences you’ve been through. Trust me, the last thing I want to do is hurt you again. I swear on my d**k.” I laughed so loud when he said the last sentence. “So you are sure about this?” I asked. “Yes. You are very respectful, and I like the way you always say ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’ I want to be with you and I am not coming to do trial and error. I mean business.” So I said him. Before I walk you through, my experience with yes to K, allow me to take you through my experience with the others before him.

My first relationship was with Mike. I was twenty two and he was a little older. We were so in love and I believed that he was the man I was going to end up with. In the fifth year of our relationship, he discussed a business idea with me. It was a foolproof plan and the only thing he needed to make it happen was funding. He told me, “Why don’t you give me a loan? I promise to pay you back when the business picks up.” I replied, “That’s a lot of money. I don’t have. Which other way can I support you?” He suggested that I should take a loan from the bank on his behalf; “You earn good money. The bank will easily give you a loan when they see your credit.”

As I said, I was sure Mike was the one. Plus we had been together for five years and everything was good between us. There was no reason to doubt him. So I took the loan for him and I bought him a container with my money to show him that I believed in him. Immediately after Mike got his hands on the money, he dumped me. As I was trying to understand where I went wrong, he started displaying his relationship with a lady he had introduced to me as his cousin. I had to pay off that loan by myself.

I stayed away from men and relationships after what Mike did. I enjoyed spending time with myself and the freedom that came with being single. However, things changed a year later when I met my baby daddy on campus while we were both furthering our education. I believed he was genuine so I gave him a chance. When we were together, he often complained about money because he wasn’t earning enough as a pupils teacher. He didn’t have any external support too. I was touched by his situation and paid his school fees for two semesters. While I was paying my own school fees too. This guy never offered to pay for my transportation when I visited him. I was the only giver in the relationship but I never complained.

A year into our relationship, I got pregnant. When I told him about it he snapped. That day revealed a lot more about him than I ever knew the entire time we were together. He told me, “You know that I don’t have money so don’t expect me to take care of the child if you decide to keep it.” His message was not direct but it was clear. He was telling me to either get rid of it or keep it at my own cost. I chose to keep the baby and that was the end of our relationship.

After delivery and healing, I met someone named Kwame. He seemed serious at first but after a few months of dating, he ghosted me. Up to date, I don’t know what I did to scare him off. After him, I got close to K. After everything I went through, his assurance meant a lot to me. Especially when he told me he liked me because I was respectful.

Unfortunately, six months into our relationship, I was laid off from work. I didn’t want him to feel that he was financially obligated to cater to me so I went out of my way to contribute financially to the relationship. I was depending on a monthly allowance my father started giving me after I lost my job. It wasn’t much but I made sure I cooked for K all the time. Sometimes he would be at work and I’d send him a bowl of a home-cooked meal for lunch. He knew I was unemployed but he never asked, “Babe, where do you get the money to do all these things?” Or “How are you surviving in this economy without a job?”

One day he was with me when my dad called to ask if I had received the money he sent me. Since then, K started finding subtle ways to spend more of my money. If I asked to see him, he would say, “I want to see you too but I don’t have money to transport myself.” I will then order Uber for him. Sometimes he would tell me he was broke and I would divide my money and groceries in two and give him half of it. K took everything I gave without a care for my unemployed status.

This went on for over a year but I was not bothered because I was happy to help someone I loved.

Somewhere in November last year, K broke up with me without any meaningful reason. We were together for two years and it all came down to nothing. He said the last thing he wanted to do was hurt me but he did exactly that.

I have cried and asked God questions because I don’t understand why men keep walking in and out of my life after I have offered them everything I could. I know that I am not perfect but I am also not a bad person. I always do things to make my partners happy but it’s never enough to make them stay. My heart breaks whenever I look back at the sacrifices I made that were never appreciated. I’m here asking, “So dear God, Is it wrong of me to be supportive? What is wrong with being a good woman to the men in my life?

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I slept with 300 people in a year – detractors call me ‘disgusting,’ but I feel powerful

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Knight had sex with both men and women, and she told the radio show that she met many of her sex partners using dating apps. She does, however, have a list of "regulars" on fast dial for when she feels like getting down and dirty.

An Australian lady who claims to have had sex with over 300 individuals in one year described the experience as “empowering.”

Annie Knight, 26, said on “The Kyle and Jackie O Show” that she even slept with five individuals in a single day during the wild, fun-filled year.

“I felt empowered afterwards,” the adoring Australian said. “Sex makes me happy. Its purpose is to make you feel wonderful.”

Knight had sex with both men and women, and she told the radio show that she met many of her sex partners using dating apps. She does, however, have a list of “regulars” on the fast dial for when she feels like getting down and dirty.

“The messier the sex, the better,” she said.

Knight, called “Australia’s most sexually active woman,” went on to state that nothing is off limits when it comes to experimenting in the bedroom, stating, “I’m down to try anything.”

However, not everyone is thrilled by Knight’s open love of sex, with one detractor calling her “disgusting.”

Knight, who maintains an OnlyFans account, was also sacked from her marketing position when her superiors discovered her lewd online behaviour.

The sex fanatic told “The Kyle and Jackie O Show” that her website has plenty of kinky stuff since she performs “pretty much everything” on video.

Knight recently made news after speaking out about being fired from a separate site.

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“I feel empowered afterwards,” the adoring Australian stated. “Sex makes me happy. Its purpose is to make you feel wonderful.”Annie Knight via Instagram

“The last thing I wanted to do was to get fired if someone found my OnlyFans,” she said on “SBS Insight” a few weeks ago.

“There was a list of three reasons why I was fired basically,” Knight explained, adding that she was “very upset and very angry” at her employer’s decision to fire her.

“They said I falsely advised that I had a side business, didn’t ask for permission from the company to run the side business and that I had online pornographic images of myself and crude language that was against company rules,” she went on to say.

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Knight, called “Australia’s most sexually active woman,” went on to state that nothing is off limits when it comes to experimenting in the bedroom, stating, “I’m down to try anything.”Annie Knight via Instagram
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Some unusual qualities men want in a woman

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Of course, some women are born with the ability to make a terrific first impression with little to no effort, while others must work a little more.

When it comes to women, what does a man want? To a significant extent, the solution is and will continue to be a mystery.

But it hasn’t prevented scientists from trying to solve the mystery of human attraction.

On the one hand, each man has his own tastes. Qualities and features that are desirable to one guy may not be appealing to another.

However, research has discovered that many men have one trait: they prefer to believe their initial impressions. And those early moments have a significant influence on their level of attraction to certain women.

Of course, some women are born with the ability to make a terrific first impression with little to no effort, while others must work a little more.

Here are five characteristics that men find particularly appealing in women, according to a study.

Natural-looking makeup, including eye makeup and lipstick

Some males remark that they prefer women who do not wear makeup because they appear more natural. However, according to a Zoosk poll, 139 of 1,200 women who applied eye makeup in their profile photo were more likely to receive responses from males. Men were also more likely to desire to meet a lady if her profile photo included lipstick.

Women who wear “darker” cosmetics, on the other hand, were less likely to be asked out. Even if men claim they prefer women who appear “natural,” this implies you may wear “natural” cosmetics and still attract guys.

Also, fellas, it’s quite OK to remark that your girl looks great with winged eyeliner and red lipstick.

The ideal waist-to-hip ratio

This choice is based on health and fertility rather than appearance.

“Evidence also shows that waist-to-hip ratio is a strong indicator of a woman’s oestrogen levels, risk of obesity, and susceptibility to major diseases such as diabetes, ovarian cancer, and heart disease,” according to the study.

Dressing in red clothes

The colour red represents passion. It’s no surprise that males find it appealing. In a research conducted by psychologists at the University of Rochester, men were given images of various women with framed borders of either red or white and were asked how attractive they thought the ladies were.

They were then given an identical photo with the ladies dressed in either red or blue and asked how much they would spend on a date with that woman. Women who were framed in red or wore red were more likely to be considered seductive and beautiful, and males were more likely to want to spend money on a date.

A kind attitude

A pleasant demeanour always goes a long way. Researchers from the Society for Personality and Social Psychology discovered that a woman’s responsiveness to men’s needs and desires boosted her attraction to males.

A higher-pitched voice

According to studies, women prefer males with deeper voices. For males, the reverse is usually true, since some feel “[higher] voices signal reproductive fitness, femininity, and smaller body size.”

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I introduced her to fraud but she scammed me and married my Canadian-based friend

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I introduced her to fraud but she scammed me and married my Canadian-based friend

I used to do fraud. Someone introduced it to my buddy, who then introduced it to me. The game has different stages. We were at the bottom of the game’s ladder, so we didn’t make much money, but the risk involved was excellent. Aside from the danger, you must labour every day in order to earn GHC500 every week.

We slept very little because our clients were all over the world, and because of the time difference, we had to stay awake in order to communicate with them. I had a major hit one day. I received GHC7,000 from a bargain and immediately purchased an iPhone for my girlfriend, Cynthia. She was aware that I was involved in fraud, yet she was uninterested. She became interested in the business when I gave her the iPhone and told her how I obtained it.

So when I had a customer who claimed to be a girl, Cynthia was the one who spoke to them. She was the one who set up the video calls. We were still struggling. We halted operations since the money was not flowing as promised.

Life was difficult for two jobless lovers. I couldn’t help her. I couldn’t help myself, so we relied on the generosity of friends who were succeeding in the game.

Ernest, a buddy of mine from Canada, came over one day, and we were all hanging around. Cynthia later informed me, “Your friend likes me.” He was licking his lips and staring at me in some way. Let’s go get some money from him. Tell him I’m not your girlfriend. Allow him to take me so we may obtain money from him.”

Ernest was formerly a player in the game. He went outdoors after getting money. I warned Cynthia Ernest that she might catch the hint, but she was so enthusiastic about collecting money that we gave it a shot. “Don’t let him sleep with you,” was the lone caution. Never.”

She brought me GHC 500 a week later. “He gave me 1,000 GHC.” “That’s your cut,” she explained.

Ernest was hiding the affair because he was afraid I would be upset if I found out he was seeing my sister. He was even concealing it from the team, but we were aware of what was going on.

He was here for a month, and we earned a lot of money.

He was still sending money after he left. Cynthia gave me my portion. I got a job and advised her not to see Ernest anymore. She didn’t give up. It escalated into a brawl, in which I threatened to let the cat out of the bag. “If you try it, you’ll go to jail,” she said. You know I’m familiar with all of your previous transactions. How much money can you offer me to get me to quit seeing Ernest?”

Cynthia is currently in Canada with Ernest, where they are having the time of their life. I tear up when I see their images. When I see these videos on Instagram, I want to kick them in the video.

Ernest finally understands reality. Cynthia, I believe, informed him in a way that she wouldn’t be held responsible, saying something like, “He gave me to you so we could get money from you, but I fell for you because you’re a good person.” That sort of thing.

I must confess, they had the final laugh. Cynthia informed me the last time I spoke with her, “If you stop being bitter, I will send you something small every month.” You don’t have to hate me since I don’t hate you.”

I bowed my head and kicked the bitterness out of my heart because money is money.

That girl is the only honest scammer there is. She maintained her promise. She occasionally sends me money. She’s gradually rebuilding the bridge between me and my old friend Ernest. She duped me, but I can’t really complain. I still have feelings for her but in a different manner. I adore her as someone who looks after me.

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