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I took my husband from his cheating fiancé and I’m glad I did



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I separated my husband from his unfaithful fiancée, and I’m pleased I did. This is the story of a cheating fiancée whose boyfriend I took on a silver platter. Accra Sports Stadium, 2011. I noticed him before he noticed me. He was making his way towards the row of bleachers where I was sitting. He had a mesmerizing appearance. He was of medium height and had wide shoulders. His sculpted abs were apparent through his t-shirt, enhanced by a non-existent waist. I unashamedly looked at him, and he returned my gaze with his brilliant smile. I returned her grin and altered my crop top to show off what little cleavage I had.

That’s when I noticed her and developed an immediate disliking to her. She looked like something out of an erotic film, and she was stunning! He extended his hand to her, and she grabbed it and clung to him. He glanced at me again and grinned the megawatt smile, but this time I had the impression he was mocking me and saying, “I’m taken, you cow!”

I had no idea the erotica princess was going to make my day
The game pitted King Faisal against Accra Hearts of Oak. My ex had bought the tickets, and we were meant to go to the game together, but he broke up with me just days before the game. I had determined to go to the game anyhow, if only to pass the time and annoy my ex.

The pair sat on the bench in front of me, so I could see them from a higher vantage point. In a frantic bid to avoid relegation, King Faisal was giving Hearts of Oak a run for their money. She was on her phone, which she yanked out as soon as her buttocks struck the bench and began texting. And I was smitten by the painfully attractive pair in front of me. He was watching the game, she was looking at her phone, and I was watching them.

I could see her phone’s screen from where I was. First, she spoke about girlie things with a couple of her girlfriends. But then Yaw Plumber Boy sent me an odd SMS. “He’s in town, therefore I’m forgotten,” it stated. I thought that was an unusual text from a plumber boy, so I started paying close attention. “I have to play the nice fiance, lol,” she said.

They continued on and on, flirting and insulting my lovely spouse, who hadn’t realised I was his wife yet. It wasn’t hard to figure out that Yaw Plumber boy wasn’t plumbing pipes and faucets, but rather Princess Erotica’s erotica. And Princess wasn’t just any regular fiancee; she was a con artist.

“My poor baby,” I thought, there he sat engrossed in the game, cheering on his team, oblivious to the betrayal brewing in his backyard.

I wasted no time borrowing a pen and paper from a fellow spectator, and I scribbled on one side, “Check her phone for messages from Yaw Plumber Boy.”

And on the other side of the piece of paper, I wrote my phone number.

When the game was over, I folded the paper and quickly handed it to him when she was not looking. He looked into my eyes, smiled and shook his head, as if to say, “I cannot believe your audacity.” “Read it,” was all I said.

He contacted me the next day, distressed and angry. Plumber boy was a good buddy of his. He couldn’t believe his fiancee was having an affair with his friend. I couldn’t believe it, I wasn’t sorry for anything, not even for him. “Come to Mama, darling son,” was all I could think.

We became excellent friends over the following few weeks. Not only was he devastated, but he was humiliated at how much of a fool he’d been taken for. And he was persuaded that his whole social circle was mocking him and had known all along. I listened to him rant, watched his great heart break, and saw him quiver with weeping. His finance’s infidelity took its toll on him, and he needed all the help and comfort he could receive. I stood by his side and loved him through his suffering.

He broke up with Princess Erotica, the unfaithful fiance, just weeks before their wedding. To her credit, she attempted to repair the situation. She begged and pleaded, but his family was adamant that he not marry her or even continue a friendship with her.
His mother once grabbed me aside and whispered, “Get pregnant for him.”
“In due time,” I said with a smile.

I adored him and wished for him to reciprocate my feelings. I had no intention of capturing a man whose heart had become sour as a result of betrayal. So I kept my calm, stayed and seemed to be a loyal friend, and waited for him to see me with his heart.

We were in my living room one night, him stretched on the carpet watching football and me sitting on the couch revising his poorly written thesis about the Cypriot recession. Then, out of nowhere, he rolled over to me and started rubbing my foot. I smiled down at him, and he rewarded me with the megawatt smile. When we caught gazes, I knew he was ready. We’d been friends for months and experienced many wonderful moments, but that one was different; the way he looked at me was passionate, and his eyes gave him away.
“I believe this is how support and love feel; can we quit being friends?” He inquired.

“Stop being friends?” I cocked my head to the side and asked.

“Yes, and be this instead…” He held my face in his hands and gave me the kiss of all kisses.

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How to start a new relationship: 6 tips to make it work this year



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Starting a new relationship can be quite tricky yet exciting at the same time.

You will be excited at the prospect of someone loving you and caring for you, taking time for you.

The start of a relationship might probably be the best time of your life as you are starting a new relationship. However, as excited as you might be, it is crucial to know what to do in a new relationship and what not to do in a new relationship.

How to make it work

If you understand the dos and don’ts of new relationships, it will be easier for you to move forward and form a healthy relationship with your partner.

It would help if you respected each other’s independence and choices. Although it is alright to keep in touch, be aware of each other’s whereabouts, and communicate, continuously pinging each other can also suffocate at times.

It is just that how to start a relationship can be quite complicated and tricky and requires lots of effort. Once you get used to it and know about your partner, it is easier to form a healthy relationship.

Dos and don’ts for a new relationship can help you stop second-guessing yourself. It gives you a vague blueprint about what needs to be done, and it can enhance your bond further.

  • Have realistic expectations

For a relationship to work, it is essential to be emotionally and mentally strong. You also have to be compromising and understanding. It’s not necessary that what you want in a relationship is the same as what your partner wants. So, be realistic about situations.

You can both have different thoughts and opinions, like how often you should text in a new relationship. While one person could enjoy the attention, the other appreciates space. So, it is crucial to find a middle ground.

  • Show love and affection to your partner

You might have made a new boyfriend. And now you must be thinking about starting a new relationship with a man you’ve just developed feelings for. 

You must first remember to show love and affection to your partner to strengthen the bond between you both. You must give attention and time to your partner and make eye contact with him.

  • Don’t start talking about the future prematurely

When you start a new relationship, bombarding your partner with questions and plans for the future is not how relationships work. There is a big chance that you can put your partner off.

Every relationship requires time, and you cannot imagine your boyfriend being head over heels from day one. 

You should remember that you are new to this and just starting a relationship. It is okay to be on cloud nine. However, if the question, “How to have a good relationship?” lingers in your mind, you must know that it’s all about taking things slow, one thing at a time. 

  • Don’t mention fears prematurely

At the beginning of a relationship, you and your partner are still getting comfortable with each other. Therefore, one of the crucial new relationship dos and don’ts include not mentioning your fears prematurely. 

Allow your partner the chance to discover your fears and limitations gradually. Mentioning things at the get-go can make them feel intimidated and overwhelmed. 

You can mention your fears when they become relevant to the equation you share with them. 

  • Enjoy moments

One of the big dos and don’ts in a new relationship is enjoying the present moment. 

Don’t let your past experiences and concerns about the future take away the sheen of the exciting present you are sharing with your partner. 

The best part of a new relationship is often the excitement and fun that you can have with someone. The chemistry between you two should be your focus, not the stress and anxiety about the past and present. 

  • Communicate effectively

Entering a new relationship can seem daunting as it often involves opening up to someone and sharing your life with them. However, this can be a cakewalk if you let clear communication guide you through this process. 

Treat effective communication as one of the most important dos and don’ts in a new relationship. It can make or break a relationship depending on whether you do it honestly, respectfully and openly.

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5 healthy boundaries every relationship needs this season



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Every relationship needs healthy boundaries.

Topics such as the boundaries you wish to have can save you from heartbreak down the road.

These are simple dos and donts that you expect your partner to abide by. They could be as simple as how you expect them to communicate to whether or not your relationship is exclusive.

Setting boundaries can determine the success or failure of your relationship.

Even as you enjoy the butterflies that materialize in your stomach at the sight of your new partner, consider talking about the following:

  • Communication style

This is very important information to give your partner. Tell them whether you like them to call or text, how often you need to hear from them, which pet names you like and which you don’t, etc. This will ensure that nobody gets offended when their communication preferences aren’t met.

In the same vein, talk about if and how you will address your relationship on social media. Some people are comfortable bearing it all online while others would like to keep it off social media.

  • What to do during conflict

Disagreements are inevitable and so, you need to know whether your partner needs time alone when they’re angry or they prefer to hash out your disagreement there and then. Communicate this clearly, preferably before you have your first fight, so that you know what is expected of you.

  • The type of commitment you want

To avoid any misunderstandings, clearly state what you expect as far as your relationship is concerned. Will you be exclusive or would you like an open relationship?

As you talk about commitment remember that you can’t change your partner. Even if you’ve clicked and you want different things from the relationship, it won’t end well. Be strong enough to let go if your expectations as far as commitment is concerned.

  • Intimacy

It’s very important to set sexual boundaries. Tell your partner what you like and don’t like in the bedroom, how often you’re comfortable having sex, what level of intimacy you like on a first date or in public and when you’re alone, etc. Do you mind holding hands while you’re out and about? Are you a chronic hugger?

A partner who won’t respect these boundaries or tries to coerce you to break them even when you try to remain adamant risks becoming abusive. This is a relationship red flag and you need to run.

  • Personal space

Tell your partner when you need personal space and what you require from them during this time. Do you need a few minutes alone when you wake up in the morning or do you like some quiet time when you come in from work?

Here’s just one of the examples on boundaries you should set early on in your relationship. Don’t be afraid to speak up if you feel your partner is crossing your boundaries and making you uncomfortable. And remember, some boundaries can be negotiated such that you’re both happy and on the same page.

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4 best tips to avoid getting pregnant during s*x



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There are many ways to avoid pregnancy if you are having active sex.

Sperm can live inside your uterus for up to 5 days after having sex, and pregnancy can only occur if there is sperm in your uterus or fallopian tubes when you ovulate.

You have many tools to prevent pregnancy. Birth control options are plentiful, but some work better than others. The key is to make sure you’re using them the right way.

Here’s what you can do:

  • You’re on birth control

Hormonal birth control methods such as the pill, patch, ring, implant, shot, or IUD significantly decrease your chances of getting pregnant, but they don’t eliminate your chances.

These experts say methods work in various ways. For example, IUDs block sperm from reaching the egg, while the pill, ring, and patch prevent ovulation.

  • You’re on your period

While it’s not impossible to get pregnant while on your period, your chances are pretty slim. 

Your lowest chance of getting pregnant while on your period is during the first day of bleeding. But the chances increase with each passing day as you get closer to your ovulation window. If your typical menstrual cycle is close to the average 28- to 30-day cycle, then the likelihood of getting pregnant while on your period is low. But if your cycle is shorter, your chances of getting pregnant while on your period go up.

  • You use the ‘pull-out’ method

The pull-out method may be the world’s oldest form of birth control.

The pull-out method, also known as withdrawal, involves pulling the penis out of the vagina before ejaculation.

While some studies have found that withdrawal can be as high as 96% effective with perfect use, it isn’t easy to maintain perfect use with this method. 

  • You use a condom

When using a condom to avoid pregnancy (or sexually transmitted infections, for that matter), it’s vital to use it correctly. Correct usage means the condom is rolled onto the penis (or inserted into the vagina in the case of internal or female condoms) before there’s any contact between genitals and skin. 

According to research, the chance of getting pregnant with male condoms is about 18%, and with female condoms, it’s 21%. With perfect condom use every single time, those odds decrease to 2%.

Some nursing parents use the lactational amenorrhea method (LAM) or “breastfeeding method” to prevent pregnancy after giving birth. LAM as a form of birth control relies on the temporary pause in ovulation that often accompanies breastfeeding in the first several months postpartum.

While breastfeeding, the hormone estrogen, which is responsible for getting your period each month, is suppressed experts say, hence, preventing pregnancy.

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