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I Was In My Girlfriend’s Room At Midnight When Her Real Boyfriend Came Knocking On The Door
For four years I’d been lonely. There were opportunities where I could have proposed to some women in my life and made them mine but I let those opportunities pass me by because I was focused on building my life.
The last girl that left my life left because she didn’t see any future in me. I wanted to shame that girl. I wanted to prove to her that my life could amount to something though she wrote me off. We dated for three years. She was nothing when we met. She was in school and had nothing. I was the one providing for her until she completed training college.
After raining school, she started seeing big men who promised her heaven on earth. She told me about them but each time that conversation came up she said, “You have to do something with your life. You shouldn’t live life as if it ends here. Be greater than this because life keeps moving by.”
Whenever I asked what she wanted from me, she asked me, “Are you happy the way you are? Don’t you want more? Don’t you want to make more money? Leave this job if it isn’t bringing you anything. Go back to school.
Make yourself better.” When she started giving me those lines, I knew she had seen something bigger than I’d shown her. I knew the end had come but I was only bidding my time. The guy he left me for had it all—cars, a nice job and a beautiful place to live.
She didn’t even give me the courtesy of a breakup. She just stopped picking up my calls and answering my text. A couple of weeks later I sent her a text; ”Why don’t you say something to me?” She answered, “What do you want me to say? Don’t you see it when love ends? Do you want me to break it down for you before you understand?”
That hurt. I told her, “Did I do anything to hurt you? Why would you do this to me?” That message went unanswered to date. I cried some time—not because of the breakup but because of the lack of respect in the way she left me.
I looked up and said, “God, shine on your son cos this pain is too bad.” I took her advice. I went back to school, and later got a new job which is more stable than the first. The salary was better so I started turning my life around.
All this while, I had no woman in my life and life was good. And then Catherine came along. Apart from beauty, she is smart and eloquent. She moderated an online meeting I was part and all through the meeting, I was only focusing on her and the way she pronounced certain words and made her submissions.
After the meeting, I called her; “There is so much you know that I don’t know. Can I have the chance to tap from you?” January, we were just friends. February I had proposed to her and she had told me to give her some time. March she accepted to be my girlfriend. Before that, she said, “Are you sure you’re single?
I don’t like any woman to come and beat me in your house ooo.” I assured her, “I’m so single I write ‘single in the middle of my name. There’s no one to worry about if you become mine.”
So love started and it was good. Not too long after she said yes I noticed something about her that gave me doubts. She was always on her phone whenever I was with her. When I complained she said, “You know I handle a lot of online meetings.
This is a clubhouse meeting I’m moderating.” She always had something to say so I gave her the benefit of the doubt while begging her to tone it down. Deep in the night, her phone’s screen would light up and she’ll pick up and respond. My heart was heavy but the relationship was new so I didn’t want to affect the texture anyway.
One evening, I went to visit her and she asked me, “Are you going to spend the night here?” It wasn’t my intention to spend the night there but the way she asked it sounded like she wanted me to.
I asked her, “Do you want me to spend the night with you?” She answered, “I’m your girlfriend. Do me what you like. You don’t need permission.” I said, “Ok, then let’s get jiggy.” She was on her phone texting with a serious face.
I was watching her and thinking there was a problem she was addressing. I asked, “You look worried, is there a problem?” She answered, “Is it not these silly people on our Whatsapp page. They always want my trouble.” I got up and entered the bathroom.
I was there when I heard her talking on the phone. Her voice was very low as if she didn’t want anyone to hear her.
When I came out I asked, “Catherine, who was on the phone with you?” She answered, “The way you ask questions about my phone it looks like you have problems.
Don’t you believe me? Did your last girlfriend cheat on you? Why are you so insecure?” I was gentle with her. I said, “If this happened once, I wouldn’t have had any reason to question you but it keeps happening.
Each time when we are together, your phone comes in the way.” She said, “Then you’re coming at the wrong time. I’m not always on my phone.”
As I said, the relationship was new so I didn’t want to affect the flavour.
I let sleeping dogs lie so we could have a beautiful night. We started the match around 11pm. Our lips were busy, our hands were busy touching things, and our skin was sweaty out of exhaustion.
Everything was going on well until her phone’s screen lit up. She saw it and I saw it too but she ignored it. we were too far away to be responding to calls. The calls didn’t stop coming. It even affected my mood. I was like, “Who is that person? Doesn’t he know how to stop? If you call and she doesn’t pick, you stop.”
But the person calling didn’t know how to stop so the phone’s screen kept lightening up and going dim. I got off her and said, “Answer the call, whoever is calling might have a reason.”
She said, ”Is that the reason you’ve stopped? Should we care about calls at this time of the night?” I answered, “It’s your phone. The person had been calling for the past five minutes. Maybe it’s urgent.” She answered, “I know who is calling.
If he has urgent matters, I wouldn’t be the one he would call. Just forget about him.” She took the phone and turned it off. “Are you happy now?” She asked. At that time my distin had deflated and had no desire to start all over again.
She crept into my arms and we started sleeping.
Just when I was about to doze off, I heard a knock on the door. It was loud and heavy. The kind of knock you hear when the police are at your door. She didn’t hear. She was fast gone.
A few seconds later, I heard the knock again. It was so loud it woke her up. She asked me, “Who is that?” I answered, “It’s your door so you should ask.” Before she could open her mouth and scream “Who is that?” A deep voice bellowed; “Catherine, open the door.”
She didn’t even ask who it was, she started shivering.” I asked, “Who is that? She answered hurriedly, “That’s Kwame. Please hide somewhere. He’s dangerous.” I asked, “Hide where? Why should I hide?” She was shaking and going around the room.
The voice kept shouting in front of the door; “Catherine, I know you’re there, open the door.”
From the way she was acting, I knew we were in trouble. I asked her, “Is that your boyfriend?” She said, “Stop asking questions and let’s find a way you can hide.” Her window had burglar proof so I couldn’t run through it.
Under the bed was also a bad place to hide in a situation like that. I wore my trousers and picked up my shirt. The guy was at the door trying to break the door. I said, “I would stand behind the door, when you open it, try and take him to the bedroom so I can escape.”
The guy kept shouting, “I know you’re in there with someone. I say open the door!” She called him on the phone and asked, “Are you the one breaking my door? What is wrong with you? Why are you here at this time of the night?” I heard the guy shouting, “Open the door before I break it down.”
I went to stand behind the door. Immediately she opened the door, the guy rushed to the bedroom, shouting, “You see I’ve caught you? Whoever he is, he would smell pepper today.” One huge guy. Immediately he entered the bedroom, I sneaked out. It looks like he heard it when the door closed.
I heard him shouting, “Is he the one going out?” I was far gone before he could reach me. Most of the tenants had opened their curtains trying to see what was happening. I didn’t look back. I ran with all the energy I could muster. I was shivering, thinking he might be following me. I got home safely and locked my doors.”
All night I stayed scared thinking he might have found his way to my house and was coming to attack. The morning light came and I breathed easily. I called her and she didn’t pick up. She called back around midday. She was apologizing. I asked, “Now tell me who he is and why he came around that time and why you were shivering?” She said, “Sorry I didn’t tell you.
He’s my immediate ex-boyfriend. We broke up five months ago but he doesn’t want to understand that we broke up. He still wants me but I don’t him. I’m sorry for what happened.
It won’t happen again.” I laughed. I said, “You think I will believe such a flimsy explanation? An ex who comes breaking your door in the middle of the night asking who is there with you? Thank God I escaped but I’m not coming around again.”
She said, “That’s fine. You don’t have to come to me. I would be coming to you myself.” She didn’t understand what I said so I had to explain it to her in detail. “I mean it’s over.
You’ve waved these red flags right from the beginning. You had excuses each time I asked questions but this won’t be an excuse I will accept. It’s over. I love my life so I’m going to preserve it.”
She doesn’t want to understand that it’s over. She had sent me screenshots of conversations she had had with the guy and the threat of reporting him to the police.
Somewhere the guy said, “I’ll stay away but remember that you won’t have any guy to love you the way I do.” She thinks that’s enough to convince me. She looks like she’s deeply in love with me and would do everything to have me back.
I’ve never had a woman fight for me the way she’s doing. It’s giving me second thoughts. I want to give her another chance and monitor her with my eyes wide open. On the other hand, I’m scared she’s lying. What should I do to draw the curtains on this issue?
Should I give her another chance based on the evidence she has presented or I should call it a wrap and move on?
Source: Silent Beads
Do you have any relationship experience to share? Email it: societywatch1@gmail.com
A range of herbal remedies can help reduce panic attack symptoms. Consider the following options:
- Valerian root has long been used to treat insomnia and anxiety. It may reduce the severity of panic attacks by soothing the nervous system.
- Chamomile: This plant has relaxing properties and has been long used to relieve anxiety and insomnia. Chamomile tea or supplements may help alleviate panic attack symptoms.
- Lavender: Lavender has long been used to relieve anxiety and tension because of its relaxing scent. Inhaling lavender essential oil or taking a lavender supplement may help relieve panic attack symptoms.
- Kava kava: For centuries, the Pacific Islands have used this plant to relieve anxiety and tension. It may reduce the severity of panic attacks by soothing the nervous system.
It should be noted that these herbs should not be used in place of professional medical care. If you’re having panic attacks, it’s critical that you obtain the right diagnosis and treatment from a doctor.
What causes panic attacks?
Starting a new career or migrating to a new location, as well as important life events such as getting married or having a kid, can be stressful.
Anxiety or depression in the family: If you have a family history of anxiety or depression, you may be more prone to panic attacks.
Excessive coffee or alcohol consumption, as well as sudden withdrawal or reintroduction, can cause panic attacks.
Medical disorders such as heart disease or hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) can also induce panic episodes.
It is crucial to understand that panic episodes can develop for no apparent reason. If you’re having panic attacks and aren’t sure what’s causing them, meeting with a mental health professional for further assessment and therapy may be beneficial.
How can you naturally treat a panic attack?
Deep breathing can help with physical panic attack symptoms like a racing heart and shortness of breath. Take a big breath in with your nose, hold it for a few seconds, and then exhale softly through your mouth.
To comfort oneself, employ positive self-talk such as “I can handle this,” “I am safe,” or “This will pass.”
Concentrate on the present: Panic episodes are frequently accompanied by rapid thoughts about the future or the past. Focus on your surroundings and physical sensations in your body to bring your attention back to the present moment.
Relaxation practises such as progressive muscle relaxation, mindfulness meditation, and yoga may all help you relax and quiet your mind and body.
Seek assistance: Speaking with a trusted friend or family member, as well as consulting a mental health professional, can help you manage panic attacks.
It is critical to understand that panic episodes are a normal stress response and are not dangerous. They will pass, and the more practice you have at dealing with them, the better you will become.
How can you permanently stop panic episodes without medication?
Seek expert assistance: A mental health professional can assist you in determining the reasons for your panic attacks and developing a treatment plan to manage them. Treatment may include cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) or other forms of therapy, as well as relaxation methods or lifestyle adjustments.
Deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and mindfulness meditation are all relaxation techniques that can help you relax and manage stress and anxiety.
Regular exercise can help you reduce stress and enhance your overall well-being. On most days of the week, aim for at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity activity, such as brisk walking or cycling.
Eat a nutritious diet: Eating a diet high in fruits, vegetables, and whole grains while avoiding processed and sugary foods will improve your physical and mental health.
Get adequate sleep: Sleep is essential for physical and mental health. Get 7-9 hours of sleep every night.
Recognise and avoid circumstances or activities that may provoke panic attacks, such as coffee or alcohol usage, or specific sorts of environments.
It is critical to understand that panic episodes are a normal stress response and are not dangerous. You may learn to manage panic episodes and minimise their frequency and intensity with training and the correct tactics.
Following the cessation of alcohol drinking, a range of health problems may occur, some of which may be temporary and others of which may be permanent. Here are just a few examples:
- When a heavy drinker quickly stops drinking, they may experience withdrawal symptoms such as tremors, anxiety, and insomnia. In severe cases, alcohol withdrawal can be lethal, necessitating medical attention.
- Some elements, such as vitamin B1, can be inhibited by alcohol, and long-term heavy drinking can lead to deficiencies. These shortfalls can cause a number of health problems, including fatigue, muscle weakness, and nerve damage.
- Alcohol use can contribute to the development of mental health problems such as depression and anxiety, and abstaining from alcohol may assist in facilitating these conditions. However, refraining from alcohol may induce or aggravate mental health difficulties in other settings, particularly in persons with a history of mental illness.
- Alcohol use can cause considerable liver damage, such as fatty liver disease, alcoholic hepatitis, and cirrhosis. Abstinence from alcohol can help heal some of the damage, but in extreme situations, the damage may be irreversible.
It’s important to remember that everyone is unique, and the precise health issues that may occur after stopping alcohol may differ depending on the individual’s drinking history, general health, and other variables. It’s always a good idea to consult with a doctor or other healthcare expert about the potential health hazards of abstaining from alcohol and to seek medical attention if necessary.
What happens to your body physiologically after you quit drinking?
When a person stops drinking alcohol, their body adjusts to the lack of alcohol. This can cause a variety of physical symptoms, some of which are temporary while others are long-term. Here are some of the things that might happen in a person’s body after they quit drinking:
- Better sleep: Alcohol can interrupt sleep patterns and contribute to poor sleep quality. When a person stops drinking, their sleep may improve because their body no longer has to metabolise the alcohol.
- Alcohol contains a lot of calories, and excessive drinking can contribute to weight gain. Quitting drinking may result in weight loss since the body no longer absorbs the extra calories from alcohol.
- Improved digestion: Alcohol can irritate the lining of the digestive tract, contributing to problems like acid reflux. Quitting alcohol may improve digestion and reduce the number of digestive diseases.
- Better skin health: Alcohol dehydrates the skin, which can contribute to issues such as acne breakouts. Quitting alcohol may improve skin health and reduce skin diseases.
It’s crucial to remember that everyone is unique, and the physical consequences of stopping drinking will vary based on the individual’s drinking history, general health, and other circumstances. It’s always a good idea to talk to a doctor or other healthcare professional about the potential consequences of quitting drinking, and to seek medical help if necessary.
The length of time it takes for the body to return to normal after quitting drinking is determined by a number of factors, including the individual’s drinking history, overall health, and the severity of any alcohol-related health problems. The following are some general guidelines for how long it may take for specific physiological systems to return to normal after quitting drinking:
- Alcohol withdrawal symptoms often peak within the first 24-72 hours following the last drink and can persist for several days to a week. Alcohol withdrawal can be fatal in severe circumstances, demanding medical intervention.
- Alcohol may affect the brain and nervous system in a variety of ways, and the quantity and duration of alcohol ingested influence how long it takes for these systems to recover. In other circumstances, it may take months or years for the brain to fully heal.
- Heavy drinking may gravely harm the liver, which is in charge of breaking down and metabolising alcohol. The amount of time it takes for the liver to recover depends on the degree of the lesion and the individual’s general health. The liver may be able to repair itself in certain circumstances, but in others, the damage may be irreversible.
- Alcohol can irritate the digestive system lining, contributing to illnesses such as acid reflux. Within a few days to a week, abstaining from alcohol may result in improved digestion and a reduction in digestive difficulties.
It’s crucial to remember that stopping drinking may not totally cure the body, especially if the person has been drinking heavily for a long time. Long-term alcohol addiction can cause long-term harm to several biological systems in some situations. It’s always a good idea to consult with a doctor or other healthcare expert about the potential repercussions of stopping alcohol and to seek medical attention if required.
When you stop drinking, how can you know when your liver is healing?
The liver is a powerful organ that can repair itself after alcohol injury. The amount of time it takes for the liver to recover varies on the severity of the lesion and the individual’s overall health.
The liver is a strong organ that may heal itself after alcohol damage. The length of time it takes for the liver to recover depends on the degree of the lesion and the individual’s general health.
When you stop drinking, there are a few signs that your liver is healing:
The liver creates bile, which aids in fat digestion, which improves digestion. You may notice an improvement in your digestion after you stop drinking.
Alcohol is high in empty calories, which can contribute to weight gain. When you quit drinking, your body starts burning stored fat for energy, causing you to lose weight.
Increased energy: Alcohol might make you lethargic and fatigued. You may experience a rise in energy levels while your liver repairs.
Better skin: Alcohol may cause skin to dry out and become dull. You may notice an improvement in the look and texture of your skin while your liver continues to operate regularly.
It’s crucial to remember that alcohol-related liver damage is typically irreversible, so get medical attention if you’re concerned about the health of your liver. It is never too late to make positive lifestyle changes that will enhance your health and well-being.
What happens once you stop drinking?
Depending on their circumstances and reasons for quitting, each person’s life after stopping alcohol may seem very different. Some people may discover that they have more energy and are more productive, but others may find it difficult to adjust to life without alcohol.
You may notice the following changes after quitting alcohol:
Improved health: Quitting alcohol can bring a variety of health benefits, including a lower chance of developing diseases including liver disease, some cancers, and heart disease. You may experience advantages in your sleep and digestion as well.
More time and money: Drinking alcohol may be costly and time-consuming, especially if you do it regularly. If you stop drinking, you may be able to devote more time and money to other hobbies and activities.
Improved relationships: Alcohol can impair your judgement and conduct, leading to disagreements with loved ones. Quitting alcohol may help you enhance your social ties and communication skills.
Increased self-esteem: Depending on your motivation for quitting drinking, you may experience a feeling of success and satisfaction in your decision. This might boost your self-esteem and happiness.
It is vital to recognise that quitting alcohol is a personal decision, and everyone’s experience will be unique. It may be difficult at times, but the potential benefits are well worth the effort.
One of Johannesburg’s busiest roadways has been extensively damaged as a result of a suspected explosion from an underground gas pipeline.
Videos show portions of the road collapsing and automobiles flipping upside down.
According to authorities, one person was murdered and several were injured.
At the moment of the detonation, some witnesses described feeling the earth shake and then hearing a huge bang.
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