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My Married Ex-Boyfriend Came To Propose Marriage To Me

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After high school, I studied a certificate course and got a job in a health facility. I worked for a while and saved some money to further my education. I couldn’t afford to pursue a degree, so I applied for a diploma course somewhere in 2017.

I had some trouble printing out my application letter so I asked my friend, Akua to help me. She couldn’t do it so she introduced me to a guy named Harry. “Harry is a tech wizard. He will help you print your letter.” She said.

True to her words, Harry helped me with my printout. About two weeks later, he called me to wish me a happy birthday. I was surprised, “How did you know it was my birthday? And how did you even get my number? Because I know Akua wouldn’t give it to you without asking me first.” He laughed, “Is it supposed to be a secret? Don’t worry, I’m not a stalker.

I saw your details the day I helped you print out your confirmation letter.” Upon hearing that I felt at ease, and continued talking to him. We had more conversations following that one, and that’s how our friendship started.

We were talking one day when he told me “I liked you the very first day I saw you. And my feelings for you have deepened these past few weeks. I want you to be my girlfriend.” I wasn’t ready for a relationship at that time. I was nursing a five-year heartbreak. So I turned him down.

He wasn’t ready to give up, “How can you say no just like that? At least take some time to think about it.” I shook my head at him; “There’s no point in stringing you along. I am just not interested in a relationship right now.” After that conversation, things became strained between us. It got to a point we stopped talking to each other completely.

Somewhere in 2018, Harry reached out to me on Instagram. He said he lost my number, and that he wanted us to talk. I sent my number to him and he texted me. We chatted about how we were doing in life and how we missed each other. “If you’ve missed me, then come and visit me.” He asked.

I really did miss him, so we fixed a date and I went to his place. It was my first time going there. He lived in a single-room apartment. He had a mattress that looked like it had been passed down from generation to generation, lying on the floor. He didn’t have a TV, only a standing fan. His room was so dirty that I asked for a broom and swept it, before sitting down on his couch. Half of the couch was occupied with dirty laundry. I was uncomfortable the entire time I was there. I kept wondering why he didn’t bother to clean when he knew that I was coming over.

He smiled shyly and said, “I don’t have anything to offer you besides a bottle of fruit juice, and a piece of bread.” I didn’t want to eat it but I also didn’t want to be rude, so I shared it with him. That da he proposed to me again. I asked him “Are you not dating my friend Akua?” “Oh no. Akua and I are just friends. And I have no interest in her. You can ask her if you don’t believe me.”

I didn’t believe him but I still wasn’t interested in dating him so I didn’t bother asking Akua. This time we continued to stay in touch. By 2019 I had learned that my friend was crushing on him but he wasn’t interested in her. I considered giving him a chance if he proposed to me again.

Later that year, he called to tell me he had moved to a new place. “You should come and see it.” So I went to his new place. It was better than the previous one. That day we talked and he proposed to me again. I was ready for him this time so I said yes. Our relationship had its sweet and sour moments.

We hadn’t met each other’s family in the course of our friendship. So when we started dating, I introduced him to my sister. After that, we made plans for him to meet my family. But I couldn’t go through with it because something was off about him.

Every time I visited him, I’d see a woman’s belongings either hidden somewhere or just lying around in the room. The first time I asked, he said “My sister came to visit me, and left them here.” I had never met his sister but I had a feeling he was lying. This continued for a long time.

One day I decided to go through his room to see if I would find anything that would give away the owner of the clothes. I searched the entire room and came across a marriage list. What broke my heart the most was, that he had bought the items on the list, and hidden them where he thought I wouldn’t look. That day I cried till I felt there were no tears left in my tear ducts.

When he came home I confronted him about what I saw and he looked confused. I started crying while asking him “What did I do to you that you’ve deceived me like this? You are getting ready to marry someone but you are pretending I’m the only woman in your life.

How did I offend you?” Harry also started crying, “I don’t know what you are talking about. I haven’t seen any marriage list or items in this room. Why don’t you trust me?” I showed him the list and the items and he insisted he didn’t know anything about them. Later he concluded that his sister must have hidden them in his room for safekeeping. I didn’t believe him but I didn’t have any evidence to prove he was lying either.

As fate would have it, I received a call from a lady named Betty in 2020. She introduced herself as Harry’s sister, “I have seen that my brother is always talking to you. When I ask him about you, he acts shy. Are you his girlfriend?” There was just something about the way she spoke that told me she is not Harry’s sister.

To confirm my suspicions, I told her everything about my relationship with Harry. Her reaction to the vivid details I shared with her confirmed my suspicions. She told me “Harry is my fiancée. The marriage list and the items you saw are mine. All the clothes you’ve been seeing in his room are mine. We will be getting married in a few weeks. I’m sorry you are finding out like this.” She added Harry to the call and confronted him about his deception. He couldn’t talk, he just hang up.

After my conversation with Betty, I called Harry. He answered and said, “I will call you back.” He didn’t call me back till January 2021. He apologized, “I am sorry about what happened. I didn’t mean to lie to you. If you must know, Betty left me. She is married to another guy as we speak. If there’s a part of you that still loves me, please give me another chance to prove my love for you. Let me make things right by marrying you.”

I told him no. This guy called my mother and pleaded with her to talk to me on his behalf. He sounded so sincere, but I just knew he was lying. I didn’t have proof of his lies so I called my friend Akua and asked her some questions about Harry’s marriage. She told me he was married and sent me his wedding invite and photos. He married Betty two months after she called me. I was shocked that Harry still had the guts to come back into my life with the intention to deceive me again.

I don’t know what I did to him to make him do that to me. My experience with him has made me wary of men. Whenever a guy approaches me, I think “He is a wicked man pretending to love me. I’m sure he’s probably married or has a fiancée.” I see all men as wicked creatures. At this rate, I’m sure I will never love again.

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Herbal cures for panic attacks: all the facts and more

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It is critical to understand that panic episodes are a normal stress response and are not dangerous. You may learn to manage panic episodes and minimise their frequency and intensity with training and the correct tactics.

A range of herbal remedies can help reduce panic attack symptoms. Consider the following options:

  • Valerian root has long been used to treat insomnia and anxiety. It may reduce the severity of panic attacks by soothing the nervous system.
  • Chamomile: This plant has relaxing properties and has been long used to relieve anxiety and insomnia. Chamomile tea or supplements may help alleviate panic attack symptoms.
  • Lavender: Lavender has long been used to relieve anxiety and tension because of its relaxing scent. Inhaling lavender essential oil or taking a lavender supplement may help relieve panic attack symptoms.
  • Kava kava: For centuries, the Pacific Islands have used this plant to relieve anxiety and tension. It may reduce the severity of panic attacks by soothing the nervous system.

It should be noted that these herbs should not be used in place of professional medical care. If you’re having panic attacks, it’s critical that you obtain the right diagnosis and treatment from a doctor.

What causes panic attacks?

Starting a new career or migrating to a new location, as well as important life events such as getting married or having a kid, can be stressful.

Anxiety or depression in the family: If you have a family history of anxiety or depression, you may be more prone to panic attacks.

Excessive coffee or alcohol consumption, as well as sudden withdrawal or reintroduction, can cause panic attacks.

Medical disorders such as heart disease or hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) can also induce panic episodes.

It is crucial to understand that panic episodes can develop for no apparent reason. If you’re having panic attacks and aren’t sure what’s causing them, meeting with a mental health professional for further assessment and therapy may be beneficial.

How can you naturally treat a panic attack?

Deep breathing can help with physical panic attack symptoms like a racing heart and shortness of breath. Take a big breath in with your nose, hold it for a few seconds, and then exhale softly through your mouth.

To comfort oneself, employ positive self-talk such as “I can handle this,” “I am safe,” or “This will pass.”

Concentrate on the present: Panic episodes are frequently accompanied by rapid thoughts about the future or the past. Focus on your surroundings and physical sensations in your body to bring your attention back to the present moment.

Relaxation practises such as progressive muscle relaxation, mindfulness meditation, and yoga may all help you relax and quiet your mind and body.

Seek assistance: Speaking with a trusted friend or family member, as well as consulting a mental health professional, can help you manage panic attacks.

It is critical to understand that panic episodes are a normal stress response and are not dangerous. They will pass, and the more practice you have at dealing with them, the better you will become.

How can you permanently stop panic episodes without medication?

Seek expert assistance: A mental health professional can assist you in determining the reasons for your panic attacks and developing a treatment plan to manage them. Treatment may include cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) or other forms of therapy, as well as relaxation methods or lifestyle adjustments.

Deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and mindfulness meditation are all relaxation techniques that can help you relax and manage stress and anxiety.

Regular exercise can help you reduce stress and enhance your overall well-being. On most days of the week, aim for at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity activity, such as brisk walking or cycling.

Eat a nutritious diet: Eating a diet high in fruits, vegetables, and whole grains while avoiding processed and sugary foods will improve your physical and mental health.

Get adequate sleep: Sleep is essential for physical and mental health. Get 7-9 hours of sleep every night.

Recognise and avoid circumstances or activities that may provoke panic attacks, such as coffee or alcohol usage, or specific sorts of environments.

It is critical to understand that panic episodes are a normal stress response and are not dangerous. You may learn to manage panic episodes and minimise their frequency and intensity with training and the correct tactics.

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Health Issues After Quitting Alcohol: Everything You Need to Know

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It is vital to recognise that quitting alcohol is a personal decision, and everyone's experience will be unique. It may be difficult at times, but the potential benefits are well worth the effort.

Following the cessation of alcohol drinking, a range of health problems may occur, some of which may be temporary and others of which may be permanent. Here are just a few examples:

  • When a heavy drinker quickly stops drinking, they may experience withdrawal symptoms such as tremors, anxiety, and insomnia. In severe cases, alcohol withdrawal can be lethal, necessitating medical attention.
  • Some elements, such as vitamin B1, can be inhibited by alcohol, and long-term heavy drinking can lead to deficiencies. These shortfalls can cause a number of health problems, including fatigue, muscle weakness, and nerve damage.
  • Alcohol use can contribute to the development of mental health problems such as depression and anxiety, and abstaining from alcohol may assist in facilitating these conditions. However, refraining from alcohol may induce or aggravate mental health difficulties in other settings, particularly in persons with a history of mental illness.
  • Alcohol use can cause considerable liver damage, such as fatty liver disease, alcoholic hepatitis, and cirrhosis. Abstinence from alcohol can help heal some of the damage, but in extreme situations, the damage may be irreversible.

It’s important to remember that everyone is unique, and the precise health issues that may occur after stopping alcohol may differ depending on the individual’s drinking history, general health, and other variables. It’s always a good idea to consult with a doctor or other healthcare expert about the potential health hazards of abstaining from alcohol and to seek medical attention if necessary.

What happens to your body physiologically after you quit drinking?

When a person stops drinking alcohol, their body adjusts to the lack of alcohol. This can cause a variety of physical symptoms, some of which are temporary while others are long-term. Here are some of the things that might happen in a person’s body after they quit drinking:

  • Better sleep: Alcohol can interrupt sleep patterns and contribute to poor sleep quality. When a person stops drinking, their sleep may improve because their body no longer has to metabolise the alcohol.
  • Alcohol contains a lot of calories, and excessive drinking can contribute to weight gain. Quitting drinking may result in weight loss since the body no longer absorbs the extra calories from alcohol.
  • Improved digestion: Alcohol can irritate the lining of the digestive tract, contributing to problems like acid reflux. Quitting alcohol may improve digestion and reduce the number of digestive diseases.
  • Better skin health: Alcohol dehydrates the skin, which can contribute to issues such as acne breakouts. Quitting alcohol may improve skin health and reduce skin diseases.

It’s crucial to remember that everyone is unique, and the physical consequences of stopping drinking will vary based on the individual’s drinking history, general health, and other circumstances. It’s always a good idea to talk to a doctor or other healthcare professional about the potential consequences of quitting drinking, and to seek medical help if necessary.

The length of time it takes for the body to return to normal after quitting drinking is determined by a number of factors, including the individual’s drinking history, overall health, and the severity of any alcohol-related health problems. The following are some general guidelines for how long it may take for specific physiological systems to return to normal after quitting drinking:

  • Alcohol withdrawal symptoms often peak within the first 24-72 hours following the last drink and can persist for several days to a week. Alcohol withdrawal can be fatal in severe circumstances, demanding medical intervention.
  • Alcohol may affect the brain and nervous system in a variety of ways, and the quantity and duration of alcohol ingested influence how long it takes for these systems to recover. In other circumstances, it may take months or years for the brain to fully heal.
  • Heavy drinking may gravely harm the liver, which is in charge of breaking down and metabolising alcohol. The amount of time it takes for the liver to recover depends on the degree of the lesion and the individual’s general health. The liver may be able to repair itself in certain circumstances, but in others, the damage may be irreversible.
  • Alcohol can irritate the digestive system lining, contributing to illnesses such as acid reflux. Within a few days to a week, abstaining from alcohol may result in improved digestion and a reduction in digestive difficulties.

It’s crucial to remember that stopping drinking may not totally cure the body, especially if the person has been drinking heavily for a long time. Long-term alcohol addiction can cause long-term harm to several biological systems in some situations. It’s always a good idea to consult with a doctor or other healthcare expert about the potential repercussions of stopping alcohol and to seek medical attention if required.

When you stop drinking, how can you know when your liver is healing?

The liver is a powerful organ that can repair itself after alcohol injury. The amount of time it takes for the liver to recover varies on the severity of the lesion and the individual’s overall health.

The liver is a strong organ that may heal itself after alcohol damage. The length of time it takes for the liver to recover depends on the degree of the lesion and the individual’s general health.

When you stop drinking, there are a few signs that your liver is healing:

The liver creates bile, which aids in fat digestion, which improves digestion. You may notice an improvement in your digestion after you stop drinking.

Alcohol is high in empty calories, which can contribute to weight gain. When you quit drinking, your body starts burning stored fat for energy, causing you to lose weight.

Increased energy: Alcohol might make you lethargic and fatigued. You may experience a rise in energy levels while your liver repairs.

Better skin: Alcohol may cause skin to dry out and become dull. You may notice an improvement in the look and texture of your skin while your liver continues to operate regularly.

It’s crucial to remember that alcohol-related liver damage is typically irreversible, so get medical attention if you’re concerned about the health of your liver. It is never too late to make positive lifestyle changes that will enhance your health and well-being.

What happens once you stop drinking?

Depending on their circumstances and reasons for quitting, each person’s life after stopping alcohol may seem very different. Some people may discover that they have more energy and are more productive, but others may find it difficult to adjust to life without alcohol.

You may notice the following changes after quitting alcohol:

Improved health: Quitting alcohol can bring a variety of health benefits, including a lower chance of developing diseases including liver disease, some cancers, and heart disease. You may experience advantages in your sleep and digestion as well.

More time and money: Drinking alcohol may be costly and time-consuming, especially if you do it regularly. If you stop drinking, you may be able to devote more time and money to other hobbies and activities.

Improved relationships: Alcohol can impair your judgement and conduct, leading to disagreements with loved ones. Quitting alcohol may help you enhance your social ties and communication skills.

Increased self-esteem: Depending on your motivation for quitting drinking, you may experience a feeling of success and satisfaction in your decision. This might boost your self-esteem and happiness.

It is vital to recognise that quitting alcohol is a personal decision, and everyone’s experience will be unique. It may be difficult at times, but the potential benefits are well worth the effort.

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South African roadway fissures as a result of the Johannesburg explosion

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South African roadway fissures as a result of the Johannesburg explosion

One of Johannesburg’s busiest roadways has been extensively damaged as a result of a suspected explosion from an underground gas pipeline.

Videos show portions of the road collapsing and automobiles flipping upside down.

According to authorities, one person was murdered and several were injured.

At the moment of the detonation, some witnesses described feeling the earth shake and then hearing a huge bang.

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