I’ve been married for 12 years and have three children. My husband is now accusing me of cheating on him because I have a male buddy who usually comes to my aid when I am in trouble, and he is well aware of this. We started dating when neither of us had anything, but when he left for school, I was there for him. I love him so much that I was willing to go out of my way to make him happy.
During our dating phase, I met a number of well-to-do people, but I selected him over everyone because I want us to suffer together. He knocked, but when the marriage list arrived, he didn’t have any money, so I had to borrow money for our wedding since I also wanted us to marry. Pay off every debt, from his suit to his mother’s clothing on that day. Out of love, I bought my clothing, luggage, and everything else I needed for that day. Things were difficult for us after our wedding. Even with his tertiary semester costs, I had to phone those male pals of mine he accuses me of having something to do with in order for him to be able to go.
I trust him so much that I can beat my heart that he does not womanize, yet we all have flaws. I was furious when I saw those things on his phone, but he will apologize, and I will understand and forgive him. But my concern now is that if we argue, he will insult me and say things about me that I don’t understand. When we’re in need and I contact those individuals to borrow money, he doesn’t mind, but if those people call or send me, he has a problem. I, too, don’t want it to appear like I only contact them when I’m in need, so if they phone me, I answer.
Something happened several years before we married. After 15 years of marriage, my spouse is still using that stuff to insult me. I told him I was going someplace, but I changed my mind and went somewhere else, which led to a disagreement between us. I apologized and explained everything to him, and he understood and forgave me, but my husband still uses that incident to humiliate me after 15 years. Now I’m exhausted and unsure what to do.
I’m considering divorce, but I don’t want my children to grow up in a broken family. Please advise.
