Hello. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to atone for my actions and set myself free. I’m a girl 18 years old. My young man is nineteen years old. We attend the same school and are in the same class. We attend an international school and study according to the British curriculum. He is not a Ghanaian, but I am. Because our parents are business partners, they are close. We began dating in this manner two years ago. I’m a Christian, his family is agnostic, and he may believe anything he wants. Last year, I tried to persuade him to accompany me to church, and we began attending together. Our parents travel frequently, and my older brother generally looks after me while they are not there. He does, however, have a caregiver.
He’s really daring and freewheeling. That’s what I find appealing about him. I’m more reserved and laid back. We’ve been creeping around the church doing some strange things. We’ve gotten intimate in the restroom three times so far. We tried one of the church’s smaller auditoriums after service one evening, but we had to leave because we heard footsteps coming. My guy enjoys performing these activities with me. He claims that doing it in our rooms has become tedious, and he is looking forward to the new adventure. I’ve told him that I feel incredibly disgusting and immoral every time we do it in church. He’s a new Christian. Although his parents are unaware, I lead him in saying the sinner’s prayer. These things don’t bother him the way they do me. I tried talking to my school psychologist, and she told me that I shouldn’t make him push me to do something I’m not comfortable with, but that if he does it with my agreement, I should simply make sure he wears protection. That is something we both stand firm on.
My parents are aware that we have sexual relations, and my mother has instructed me to always use protection. Apart from that, we don’t talk about these topics. It’s strange. My partner says I feel filthy because of what the preacher says. He tells me a lot of things that make me doubt Christianity, and I’m not sure what to believe anymore. My brother no longer goes to church. Except for important events such as Crossover. Admin, I’m wondering if you have any open-minded persons on your page who will view this for me without passing judgment. Why do I feel so horrible once we get close? Is it spiritual, or is it just my subconscious mind reminding me of all of our pastor’s teachings? Can I purify myself in any way other than begging God for forgiveness? My partner and I differ on this point, and he knows I’ll be discussing it. We’ll both read the comments. Thank you for developing this platform.
Source: Anonymous Confessions
